(What Where Who) am i?

This quarantine is driving me mad

I can’t keep track

In control but mostly not

I feel ugly

I feel fat

I dream of

bloodbaths

A man shot himself

On top of a car

At my local

Walmart

I see myself

In the bloodied brains

Splattered on the pavement

I get the crazy and insane

Not just feeling

But being

In body and out of too

Round in circles

Can’t break through

Purging is attacking

Because bingeing is

Too much

Not enough

This cycle I thought had ended

Has come back too soon

Welcome back darkness

Demon I cradle

Welcome back darkness

Forever returning too soon